The Stangel Brothers have a dream.
Some day, hopefully soon, Eric and Justin Stangel will throw out the first pitch at a professional baseball game in Japan.
You’re probably asking yourself , “Who cares?”
We care. It’ll be fun. A life experience. And most importantly, it’ll be a nice PR hit for whichever team decides to go through with it.
A 2008 Time Magazine story states that the NPB, Japan’s equivalent of MLB, makes approximately $1 billion annually. Surely some team can afford to fly Eric and Justin to Japan, put us up in a cool hotel for a few days, give us a super cool translator who knows how to have a good time and let us throw out the ceremonial first pitch.
We know we’re not a draw. But we will promote the hell out of it here and proudly wear the free team-issued uniforms you’ll present to us when we come back to the states. We’ll be a walking billboard for your team.
We will document our travels and experiences on StangelBros.com, which between us, may or may not be in the process of being purchased by Mark Zuckerberg of Facebook. (We here at StangelBros.com do not comment on business operations.)
We aren’t picky. We will go with any team. For those who don’t know much about the NPB, the teams are Chunichi Dragons, Hanshin Tigers, Hiroshima Toyo Carp, Tokyo Yakult Swallows, Yokohama DeNA Baystars, Yomiuri Giants, Chiba Lotte Marines, Fukuoka SoftBank Hawks, Hokkaido Nippon Ham-Fighters, Orix Buffaloes, Saitama Seibu Lions, and the Tohoku Rakuten Golden Eagles. Whoever chooses us will get our eternal gratitude. Basically our allegiance is up for grabs.
And we’re not taking this lightly. Once the plans are made, we will consult with Meadowlark Lemon, the legendary Harlem Globetrotter and Basketball Hall Of Famer, about how to behave and what to expect on our journey, since after all, we will be world ambassadors.
We will also chat with CJ Nitkowski, a former major league relief pitcher who spent two years with the Fukuoka SoftBank Hawks. Sure, CJ has a screw loose, but he must have something to offer.
We will also practice. Practice until it hurts. And then practice some more. We can’t guarantee much, but we can tell you we’ll at least do a better job than 50 Cent.
We will take this seriously. There’s a lot riding on it.
We are the right people at the right time.
Won’t someone make our dream come true? (Again, the PR alone will pay for the trip tenfold.)
God bless America. And of course, bless the teams of the Nippon Professional Baseball League.